Yesterday was Sunday and one of my very kind friends who lets me pretend that her baby is mine on occasion called me to see if I would watch her little boy during one of the classes. Of course I said YES!!! He is the cutest most adorable little boy (aside from mine :)) and how could a girl say no to such blue eyes.
He came to me asleep. I laid him in my arms. It felt so natural. I really had to try to hold it together. Wiping my tears and my nose became almost too much for me, almost had to leave the Primary room. As I held him in my arms while he was sleeping, I thought, "I should be holding Daxton. I should be holding MY baby." And immediately the thought came to me with a peace only from our Father in Heaven, "No, you shouldn't be holding Daxton. He was never meant to stay here very long. You had him as long as you were supposed to."
And so I realize. Daxton was here for the time that he was supposed to be, not a moment longer I might add. While I miss him terribly, I know that he is performing a greater work in Heaven. Just thought I would share.
8 comments:
Thank goodness for the tender mercies of the Lord and thank goodness some of us are close enough to Him to notice them.
Thanks for the willingness to share with us you're thoughts, they are more than interesting.
I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving - my thoughts are with you and your family often.
~Krista Darrach
Brittany, you are so amazing. I don't know how you do it, except with the spirit of the Lord with you all the way. I strive to be more like you. We love you guys, and you are in our prayers each night. I also hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving, and that it isn't too hard.
You are so cool. Thanks for being such a good example of how to balance sadness and perspective. Those are two hard things to have at the same time but I think it is so important to not skip either of them. I am still learning how to have the two coexist.
Brittany, I know that came from Heavely Father because he said that same thing to me. (word for word in fact.) Amazing how Father works huh? I had that same thought. Gavin should be here with me now. And the same response "no, No he shouldn't. He is right where he is suppose to be." Thanks for sharing. It lifts my testimony when I hear Heavenly Father say the same thing to other mom's that he said to me. (out of the mouth of a few witnesses I guess)
Michelle larsen
Gavin's Mom
Thank you- I feel this ache too, and always get the same assurance that my son was here for as long as needed, and now he's home doing important work.
We are so blessed to recogonize the spirit in our lives!!! You are in our prayers EVERY day!!!
I know just what you mean. I think you are so amazing and I wish we would have met by different circumstances, but still the same I am grateful to know you! I am positive that Jack and Dax are buds up there! :)
I am what I think is called a Blog Stalker. I don't remember how I came across your blog unless it was from Stephanie's blog and I don't remember how I found her's either. :)
My 3 month old son died July 1, 2006. We had multiple spiritual experiences in the almost three months that he lived. I appreciate your comment about feeling that it is ok that Dax spent the right amount of time on earth. I have read many women cry and lament (I think that is the right word I am looking for) that their child "should" be at a particular event. Just this week, I had some people over to close their Pampered Chef show. They each had a two year old one of which was born in our ward the same time as Kris. There was no sadness that he should have been there. I have felt guilt over not feeling sad in those circumstances. I often have wondered if I was an unfeeling person because of not being affected the same way as those other women. I now know that it is a tender mercy given to me. Thank you.
Steph K
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