Dear Elder...

Wow. I wonder if any of you are still reading this. I have been less than stellar at writing lately. Ok, practically non existent! Have you wondered where I have been? Or have you just given up on me?

My brother who is on a mission so wonderfully pointed out that he goes to check my blog to see the going’s on of the family and has come up blank. I have officially been cussed!

**ok Isn't she A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E**

Speaking of my brother, who is serving a mission, Daniel, is his name, or Elder Walter more recently, has been out on his mission for almost a year! I can’t believe how fast the time goes. It sure has been lonely around here without his wit and sarcasm. Luckily we get to talk to him in a few days! YIPEE! Thank goodness for skype, we actually get to see who we are talking to. I remember back in the day when snail mail was the only means of communication. Does that make me old? No. But it likely makes you older J.

**and her too**

I don’t know what my problem lately with my blog is. I get looking through my google reader at all the blogs I follow and I guess I just feel inadequate. Like my blog is less important so why even bother. Or some people have really good “themes” trickled throughout the week, and mine is just ramblings, so why bother.

**seriously, anymore cuteness would be illegal**

Well people I am turning over a new leaf. I have just come to the realization that that isn’t all that important. So what if I am not the most popular blog on the block or have the most followers or the most comments (or any at all J), my life is important to me. And it is important to my kids. So I will carry on and post my boring ramblings and ADORABLE pics of my kiddos.

**officially ILLEGAL**

Aren’t they adorable? Don’t you want to scoop them up and bring them home? Too bad. They are mine.

Congratulations!

I officially had the WORST blogging month in the history of my blogging career. I don't know what it is. Maybe I am just lazy. Or busy. Or lazy. Ya. More kinda lazy.

Well folks. I have an announcement to make. Some of you may be disappointed that I haven't told you in person, but I apologize. It is what it is and sometimes it is just easier to "blog" about it.

I am...... a STUDENT again! I have officially been accepted to the ASU graduate Doctorate of Pediatric Nurse Practitioner program. SO, as of June 1, I will be in class!

Some time ago, ok, my whole entire life, I knew that I needed to do something more, to be something more. I prayed and I fasted and I prayed some more. I prayed that I would be satisfied and content with being a mom and a nurse. I did. I really did. I tried to ignore the burning inside to continue on to graduate school. I have fought it for 3 years now. Some of my classmates from my undergraduate went right into their respective graduate programs. I knew that it wasn't for me at that moment, and now I know why.

It is actually a cool program. Most of it is online and there are only 6 days a semester that I will have to physically be in class. And some of those are NIGHTS! Yay! Hopefully work will work with me as long as I can stand to work :) AND go to school AND be a mom :). I love all of those things and it is sooooo hard to choose which ones I want to do, so I suppose I will do them all.

SO there you have it. That's all folks!

Jealous Much?

I learned a powerful lesson the other day in my institute class. It was about Sacrifice.

3 Nephi 9:19-20

Elder Maxwell said,

“Real, personal sacrifice was never placing an animal on the altar. Instead, it is a willingness to put the animal in us upon the altar and letting it be consumed.”

Hartman Rector said,

“Surely, in the work of the Lord, it is what we do after we think we have done enough that really counts with Him, for that is when the blessings flow. If you would have a blessing from the Lord, put something upon the altar. Make a sacrifice.”

There is something in my life that I have really struggled with lately. And it is jealousy. I won’t tell you what of because that would just be too much information. And we wouldn’t want that.

But it has been eating me up inside. Literally. I have been in a pit of crap wallowing in it. I am sure this isn’t the first time I have wallowed and I am certain it won’t be the last, but it is something I have to give up or it will eat me up inside and do irreparable damage.

As I pondered the words of Elder Maxwell, that if I just take my jealousy and give it up, that the Lord would take it, and replace it with something better. So I am going to try. Try giving it to Him, and see where it goes. It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it.

****postscript: IT WORKED!!! Just sayin :)